Thursday, 17 November 2016

5 LESSONS TO LEARN FROM DATING MR. WRONG

In the Present times we are in Naija where we hear a lot of gory tale of love gone deadly, with images and pictures on the social media of men and women in serious relationship drama, we see images of stabbing, shooting, of lovers in bitter feud. With all this detailed reality facing women in today’s Nigeria, what are the very painful lessons to learn from dating Mr. Wrong? 
 A lot of women leave dysfunctional relationship to another doomed one and this can lead to a woman to hate men or to be psychologically disillusioned about love, sex and marriage.

DO NOT JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER:
This has been a very big issue for us ladies. You meet a man and strike a conversation and probably click on the surface. Some women don’t even take time to investigate these men before visiting his house and getting emotionally entangled with him. You don’t know his background, his views on women, is he in a relationship or not, is he lying or telling the truth. Some men are married and some ladies don’t bother investigating or some are in a relationship already - they just want a booty call, most times it ends up in disaster, cause after the sex the guy starts giving excuses and the lady starts crying or lamenting. For ladies not to fall into this trap next time - you have to know whom you are dealing with whether you can deal with it or not before opening your legs for the men. Here it’s not like first world countries where a criminal records can be checked, so as not to be hurt you need to investigate a man when you meet him before taking the next step.

LOOKS:
Hmmn! We women are so into this aspect, he is 6ft7 and has a body to die for and there is this normal cute guy who has sincere feelings for you because he is not your type you immediately dismiss him when he approaches you and feel he isn’t someone you are proud to introduce to your friends. When you start to date your type you realize he is just into sexing your body. He actually works in Chevron and has a nice apartment but you wonder about your HIV status, because sometimes you forget to use condom and this guy blows you over before you can reason, and you are so into a particular type and you can’t see the handwriting on the wall.


NEVER MISTAKEN LUST WITH LOVE:
Most chicks had a hard time to disentangle, they mistaken sex with love and love with sex. Love is from God and its natural when a man has the love of God he would be compassionate and have human feelings so he will be careful how he handles you and some feel when a man handles them in bed, they feel they are the only woman in the world he does that to, not knowing he has series of girlfriends who he is sexually active with. So this confuses them, so they find themselves in a relationship where they are sexual objects - by the time they realize, it’s the wedding invitation of the guy to another lady being sent to their office table, what a life?

HAVE A LIFE OF YOUR OWN, A CAREER AND A GOOD JOB:
If we women can strive harder to be better in this area, no man on earth can rubbish us. When a lady has a life of her own she doesn’t revolve around a man as her whole world, so if the man messes up she wouldn’t want to commit suicide. After a deep heartbreak she moves on and continues with her life and career before you know it she is back on her feet, even the man would wonder because she has moved on. Be prepared for the best and the worst, because men can’t be predicted - only God can show who really a man is, a man can pretend to get what he wants, pretend to be good so this relationship drama is a game and if your heart is fragile, Yaba-left is not far.

LEARN FROM OTHER PEOPLE’S MISTAKES:
A whole lot of stories are on the internet about bad relationships and also there are books that are written about bad relationships too. Why don’t you take a little peak at those stories and try learning from all this mistakes that crash a long lasting relationship down! When I try to see from my own perspective I picture what Mr. A did to Miss. B and take it into my silent little heart to meditate around it and also find out the course of the so called relationship that comes crashing down the beautiful imaginary castle, fix it to my own taste and digest it to my brain.

I think it all left for us to help our self by making a better turn…

Do leave your comment below.

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